CJ Penn's Online Writing Hangout

The reason I write: To promote Christian truth and help Jesus get His Christianity back.


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Thinking God into Existence?

I think I had fallen into another trap; a trap baited by my own natural pride.

I’ve been feeling and believing that I need to be thinking of Jesus and consciously aware of His presence in order for Him to influence my actions and the words that come out of my mouth. And to a lesser degree, I’ve been feeling that Jesus’ Spirit is within me only when I’m thinking of Him.

On the surface, this may seem fine and make some sense. But while driving home from work the other day, it hit me – the truth of what I believed punched me in my shoulder, like a tough-loving friend. And I woke up to the truth of what I was doing.

The truth is, Jesus is within me whether I consciously think of Him or not (same goes for you). This is more than a belief or a hope. How could I possibly control the presence of God by my own thought? How could I possibly dictate when God will act or speak through me, just by thinking of Him?

My pride was trying to take control again, thinking It could control God.

But my hearts desire is to absolutely surrender to the Spirit of Jesus within me. And I now realize my pride was getting in the way. And my prideful self is clever, seeking all kinds of ways to gain a sense of control. Yet as Paul said, “The mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace.” (Romans 8:6)

Surrender; leaving control of my mind and self to Jesus’ Spirit within me. I choose to give control to Jesus, rather than my prideful self. Oh, my pride will fight back – I don’t think it will ever give up. After all, I’m just a normal human. But I believe Jesus is stronger than my pride. Wow… that’s for sure. And I’m so grateful.


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Want Truth?

Are you looking for truth? Does your life feel full of confusion, delusion, and deception? Does truth seem hard to find? You will find truth in a personal relationship with the Holy Spirit… the Spirit of Jesus Christ. As Jesus said, “I will ask the Father, and he will give you another counselor to be with you forever – the Spirit of truth.” (John 14:16-17)

And… “When he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth.” (John 16:13)


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One Way

One way

We all like choices, though too many choices drives me nuts. How can I pick one shampoo from the 100 flavors on the store shelves!? Keep it simple – that’s what I crave these days.

Anyway, this morning while reading in John’s gospel, I came upon a message from Jesus that a lot of people stumble on: “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6)

Jesus is the way, the one and only way to heaven. I have friends and family who aren’t able to accept this message. They don’t like the idea of only one way to heaven. Well, keeping it simple – that’s what Jesus is doing for us. Yet why is this so hard for many of us to accept?

Thanks to my ever-present ego, I think I know the answer. Our natural human ego wants choices. With choices, our ego can make the selection and be in control. Having no choice takes all control away from our ego.

Yes, it takes humility to accept the truth of Jesus. Noble humility. It saves us from ourselves, and our pride-filled ego. The way to heaven is through Jesus; the way to Jesus is through humility.


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There is no Death

Death

Another groggy morning. But the coffee’s working… slowly. Bible open, though my eyes keep closing. Come on coffee – work harder.

Anyway, been reading John’s gospel again. I think John’s is my favorite gospel. In chapter 11, John records that Jesus said, “Whoever lives and believes in me will never die.” (John 11:26) Really? As Jesus then said, “Do you believe this?”

You know, when a flower dies, it turns to dust and ceases to exist. By saying that we who believe will never die, Jesus is saying that we will always exist. When our body stops working, though it turns to dust, our person lives on. We just change form. There is no death for those who believe.

What do you think about this?


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Looking for God?

We look in nature, we look in churches, we look in sermons and songs and books. We may think we see God there, but it’s really just a faded image.

As Brother Lawrence once said, “God alone is capable of making Himself known as He really is. God Himself paints Himself in the depths of our souls.” *

Do you want to see God as He really is? Then look inside yourself to His Spirit who lives with your soul. And believe that God will reveal Himself to you.

As Brother Lawrence also said, “Because God’s perfection is infinite, He is consequently indescribable; no words of man are eloquent enough to give a complete description of His grandeur. It is only faith that makes me know Him as He is. By means of it, I learn more about Him in a short time than I would learn in many years in the schools.”

 

* The Practice of the Presence of God, Brother Lawrence.

 


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I Confess

What’s religious confession all about? I’m remotely familiar with Catholic confession – I grew up on the fringe of the Catholic Church. And this morning I spent ten minutes researching via Google. I should be an expert by now. By what I read on a CatholicsComeHome website, confession looks like a pretty cool thing.

You ask for forgiveness of your sins and express your regret. I’m not sure if this is the way it is today, but years ago Catholic confession also included accepting a small penalty, like reciting certain prayers.

There’s something about confession that I like. It’s a safe and confidential way to unload burdens. I think it can be emotionally healthy to confess our mistakes. It’s a good exercise in humility. Whether you confess mistakes to a priest or a friend, it can be a good thing to do.

So why do I feel uncomfortable with it?

I see a dark side to such things as Catholic confession. Asking forgiveness and paying a token penalty seems harmless. BUT, I think it dishonors Jesus, it disrespects Jesus, and maybe it disgraces Jesus. I see such forms of confession as completely ignoring the love and sacrifice of Jesus.

Look, we are already forgiven. God forgave us when His Son died on the cross. To ask for forgiveness is to ignore the fact that we’re already forgiven! Also, Jesus already paid the penalty for all sins. Taking on penalties of our own ignores His sacrifice!

I see confession as a distraction from Jesus. Its focus is on the church and on the person who’s confessing. It insulates people from the love and grace of God.

As I said in the beginning, I think confession is good and everyone who loves Jesus should confess their sins, but not to a priest. We should go directly to Jesus and God. Jesus said as much in teaching us the Lord’s Prayer. But when we go to him with such prayers, maybe instead of asking for forgiveness, we should tell Him how grateful we are. And we should remember the penalty He paid for our sins. And the gratitude that swells within us will feed our love for Jesus. And as our love for Jesus grows, so do we grow.

I think this should be the nature and outcome of confession. It’s all about gratitude, love, and Jesus. What do you think?


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From Out of the Gutter

“Evangelism” – another one of those big religious words I’m not fond of. But I really like what I think it means.

I like the idea of introducing people to God and Jesus. Just show them the truth and step back, letting them decide what they will do with the truth. Showing the truth through my writing and blog posts is easy for me. It doesn’t feel pushy (I don’t want to push anyone), and the reader can easily walk away at any time. But I’m not comfortable with the face-to-face approach.

And then I recently read the story of the Prodigal Son in chapter 15 of Luke’s gospel. I love that story. It so clearly paints a picture of the unconditional forgiveness and love of God.

Imagine this: you go up to God, tell him you wish he was dead, steal a bunch of his wealth, and leave town. You then go to Vegas and party, hard and dirty. Oh, but then you get into trouble. You loose all the money you took from God and end up sleeping in the gutter. You eventually get tired of the homeless life and decide to go ask God for help. That takes a lot on humility, doesn’t it?

Anyway, before you get within a mile of his house, you see God running towards you – pretty fast for an old guy. He runs up to you, wraps his arms around you, and kisses you, with tears of joy streaming down his cheeks. He’s overjoyed to see you. He’s so happy that he throws a welcome home party for you.

This is how Jesus described God in the story of the Prodigal Son. This is the truth of the nature of God and His love for us. And this is the story I think I’ll tell if anyone asks me what I think about God. You can call it evangelism. Maybe I’ll call it helping people out of the gutter of life… helping them see the possibilities of a new life, with God and Jesus.


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The Question Is…

How do you feel about forgiveness? Is it hard for you too? Is it hard for you to forgive other people? What about yourself – is it hard to forgive your own mistakes? For me, my mistakes can ruin a good day.

Okay, now what about God? How do you feel about His forgiveness of your sins? Do you believe all your sins will be forgiven? Well, all the mistakes you’ve ever made have already been forgiven by God. God’s forgiveness is immediate and unconditional.

So the real question is not about what God’s reaction will be when we make mistakes (His reaction is a given), but what will our reaction be? Knowing about God’s forgiveness is one step; accepting it is a bigger step. That’s where faith comes in.

So let’s say you have the faith to accept God’s forgiveness of every mistake and sin that has infected your life – past and future. What will be your reaction to that vast amount of unconditional forgiveness? God hasn’t asked anything of you, except that you believe in and accept His unconditional gift. God accepts you just as you are. Will you accept Him, and His forgiveness? And by accepting, how will that make you feel? (Okay, I’m trying to lead you down a path to overwhelming gratitude. Please forgive my awkwardness.)

Oh, and when you accept God’s forgiveness, you’ll finally be able to forgive yourself, and others. Isn’t it a bit ironic that one of the biggest burdens in our life can be our lack of ability to forgive? God wants to free each of us of this burden.

Final thought: Our sins were forgiven a long time ago, by Jesus dying on that cross and paying the penalty for all sins. How do you feel about that? (Okay, looking for profound gratitude again.)

 

“Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” (Colossians 3:13)

 


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More Than a Thought

“The presence of God” – what does it mean? Is it keeping God in our thoughts, thinking of Him as often as we are able? Focusing my mind on God and Jesus throughout my day – is that my goal?

NO… that’s not good enough for me. And it’s not what Jesus promised.

Jesus prayed for and promised that we would remain “in” Him and He would remain “in” us (e.g., John 15:4). And Jesus made it clear throughout His teachings that He’s talking about His actual Spirit being in us; His Holy Spirit.

“The presence of God” is more than a thought. It’s the Holy Spirit living within you, sharing space with your soul. And I’m so grateful.


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Surrender is Freedom

Dear Internet-browsing friend,

Surrender is a hard thing to do. It goes against our defensive and self-centered nature. But when you feel the reality of the actual Spirit of Jesus living within you; when you feel the certainty of His presence; when you feel the warmth of His love – then surrender will feel easy, and you’ll crave it.

Surrendering to an unseen God you may not be certain of – that’s hard. But when your feelings show you the certain presence of Jesus within you – surrender is easy. The more you know Jesus and His love for you, the more you will trust Him. And the more you trust Him, the more you will want to give your life to Him. After all, He’s better equipped to deal with life’s problems than any of us are.

And you will discover the absolute peace, freedom and joy that come with giving control of your life to Jesus. Surrendering to men is imprisonment. Surrendering to Jesus is freedom.

Though I don’t know your name, I pray for you. I pray that you will come to feel the undeniable presence of the Spirit of Jesus living within you.


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I Surrender

I can’t handle the world – the world handles me.

It craves control of my mind,

It hungers to direct my actions.

I’m tired of being manipulated by the world.

But there is another way.

Time for a change.

I’m no longer a victim.

Surrender!

I wrest my life from the world and surrender it to God.

I pour out my self, and God fills me with Him.

What next?

That’s up to God.

What’s that I feel?

Excitement?

Anticipation?

Oh boy!!!


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A Constant Inner Joy

“His soul has been filled with a constant inner joy that is sometimes so overwhelming, he feels compelled to do what may seem to some as childish things, in order to prevent the feeling from becoming too intense.”

A constant inner joy – that’s what I crave. And I’m not alone in my hunger. There’s such an emptiness and need in this world for peace and joy. And it’s only found in an inner relationship with the Spirit of Jesus, living within us.

I’m re-reading The Practice of the Presence of God, by Brother Lawrence (for about the sixth time). That’s where the quote above comes from. Brother Lawrence knew the constant inner joy of the presence of God.

I’m on a journey to feel that same overwhelming, constant inner joy. I want to act goofy and dance for joy, simply because I can’t help myself. And I hope that somehow, I can help others find their own constant inner joy. Would you like to come along on this journey?


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Chasing Peace – Day 44 – The Beginning

My journey to escape stress and find peace has become a journey to surrender to God. That’s where I’ve found true peace… in surrender, and trust. Trusting God with my life knocks down the walls of my mind and lets His peace come pouring in.

Anyway, I believe this is my last blog post about this journey. Well, I want it to be my last– but I’ll soon see if God agrees.

I’ve decided to pull together all my blog posts about chasing peace and turn them into a small book. And writing this book should help remind me of everything I’ve learned while on this journey. Also, once the book is done, it will give me something to refer back to when I wander off the path, as I’m sure to do.

And you know, this book just might be helpful for other people. That’s why I plan to give it away. And I believe with more help from the Spirit of Jesus within me, and with some heavy editing, the messages will be stronger, and more helpful.

And maybe through this book, other people will find the peace they seek. And they will find that peace in their own personal relationship with the Spirit of Jesus. They too can learn to surrender to the peace within them.

 

←Day 43

 


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Chasing Peace – Day 43 – Lesson’s Learned, So Far

I think I’m almost done blogging about this journey of mine to escape stress and find peace. After all, I don’t think it will ever end. But so far, it’s helped remind me of some truths that are crucial to my life, such as…

I need to stop trying so hard. Just relax and let Jesus live through me. His life and energy and His presence within my mind – that’s where true peace comes from. I won’t find peace within any efforts of mine.

And I need to be patient with myself. I’m a flawed person. I’ll frequently stumble on my never-ending journey. I just need to accept this.

Another truth: pure, complete and invincible peace waits for me in heaven, where there is no stress, and no chaos.

But true peace is still available to me now, while I’m stuck in the midst of this messy world. All I need do is surrender my life to the Spirit of Jesus. As I’ve learned, selfishness creates stress, love conquers selfishness, and true love comes from surrendering to Jesus. Therefore, peace comes from surrender.

Trust… that may be the most important thing I can bring on my journey. With unconditional trust in Jesus, He will do the rest and take me home, to peace.

 

Day 36                    Day 44 →

 


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The One True Church

You don’t see it much these days – the One True Church of Jesus Christ. Yet even if you glimpsed it, you might not recognize it. What does the One True Church look like?

The true church is those people who believe and who let the Spirit of Jesus into their lives. It’s those whom Jesus has taught humility, and by that humility, they have recognized and accepted their utter feebleness. And in their feebleness, they also accept their utter inability to obey and follow God in their own strength, by their own effort. And in their utter helplessness, they realize their only hope in this life is to surrender themselves to the Spirit of Jesus.

The mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace. (Romans 8:6) The mind controlled by the Spirit IS the One True Church of Jesus Christ… the dwelling in which His Holy Spirit lives.

You don’t see it much these days. So how can the One True Church grow and become more visible? Through encouragement. To encourage those who believe in Jesus to give up their religious efforts by their own strength, to give up seeking any religious fulfillment by their own work; to instead, humbly yield themselves to the Holy Spirit. Surrender is the path to the One True Church.

 


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Chasing Peace – Day 36 – Midnight Stress Monster

Woke up last night, middle of the night, and my mind immediately started chewing on a problem at work. What brought that on? Why did my mind go there? The stress monster of work had followed me home. And it crawled into bed with me, waiting for a weakened moment to strike.

Oh God, save me from myself!

And then freedom. Wearily I crawled out of bed this morning, but now I feel joy and peace… and freedom from my inner demon, the stress monster.

Each morning is the same. I go in search of the Spirit of Jesus, who lives within me. My mind sometimes resists – for some reason it likes hanging out in that cluttered room of random thoughts. But coffee helps, or at least it wakes me up enough to steer my mind towards Jesus. And then He starts to replace the clutter with His presence. And then freedom, and peace.

There is only one true peace – living with the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of Jesus. He’s here.

 

Day 35                    Day 43 →