CJ Penn's Online Writing Hangout

The reason I write: To promote Christian truth and help Jesus get His Christianity back.


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Book Challenge Day #5 – Fuzzy

ghost writer

Day 4 (yesterday) was lost to my busyness. No progress. Barely a thought given to this book I’m trying to write and publish in 3 months.

Day 5 is starting with a fuzzy mind. Yet there is progress this morning. I’ve loosely defined all the chapters. The outline is beginning to firm up. Yet I’m feeling itchy to actually start writing.

By the way, most of my progress will happen in the mornings. With my full-time job, the early morning is the only writing time I have. And evenings are usually sacrificed to fatigue from a busy day. My shortage of available writing time adds to the challenge.

But since I’m convinced that God gave me this book idea, I have faith that He will see this book get written. Will it be published within 3 months, according to the personal challenge I’ve given myself? I would like to give that one to God, and not be concerned about it. But I won’t fool myself – I’m sure there are days ahead of me when I will severely stress about my self-imposed deadline. Yet this is just another reason to rely on God to help write this book.

 

(July 21, 2015: day 4 down, 89 more to go, of The Challenge… to write a book, from concept to self-publish, in 3 months.)


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Book Challenge Day #3 – Stressed

Currently in a hotel room, going to a wedding this evening. And this is my first post thumbed out on my iPhone. So please pardon the typos.

A crazy full weekend. But that’s not really the source of the stress I’m referring to in the title of this post. Yet it’s a factor. You see, God keeps painting a panoramic picture of the book He’s inspired me to write. Even the details are coming clearly into focus. And some of the dialog as well.

Anyway, my stress is coming from the fact that this weekend I have no time to do anything with all these images and ideas filling my head. And as is my nature, I tend to be impatient. With so much of the book so clearly shown to me, I want to start writing it now!

Patience CJ. And thank you so much Lord for overwhelming me with your generous gift of this exciting and challenging book project.

See ya tomorrow. CJ


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Book Challenge Day #2 – The Wanderer

ghost writer

It’s been a little over 24 hours since I took on the challenge to write a book, from concept to self-publish, in three months. My head is spinning with ideas. Yesterday was wild – on my drive to work in the morning, I actually abandoned my original book idea for another idea.

I was praying my way down the highway – praying that some sleepy commuter doesn’t rear-end me, as I often do, yet also praying about the book idea I had originally come up with. Then, in an instant, a new and very fresh idea started rapidly growing in my mind. By the time I got to work I had a general outline all figured out. I even had the last chapter written, in my head. And I have a title – The Wanderer. I parked my car, quickly scribbled some notes, and reluctantly walked into work, glad as always that it was Friday.

Usually on a Friday evening, my exhausted drive home is filled with thoughts of that first beer or glass of wine that waits for me. But not yesterday. The book seemed to be writing itself within my head. Filled with unusual energy, I first went swimming – the only form of exercise that doesn’t hurt my often achy, aging body. More ideas flooded into my mind as I swam. More scribbled notes in the car before finally driving home from the fitness club.

God was really speaking to me yesterday, clearly outlining this next book He wants me to write. I think He’s enjoying this as much as I am.

 

(July 18, 2015: day 1 down, 92 more to go, of The Challenge… to write a book, from concept to self-publish, in 3 months.)


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Book Challenge – Day #1

ghost writer

Challenge to self: write and self-publish a book within three months. This isn’t a new idea for me, but while checking out many of the presentations at the on-going Self-Publishing Success Summit, I finally felt energy growing within me… let’s do it.

So this morning, right after getting out of bed, I started talking with God, asking Him for ideas. What would He like me to write about that could be contained in a short, maybe 20,000-word book? I so love writing with God, because He’s always there for me. I think He loves writing too, for it’s another way He can communicate with His children. Even before I started making coffee, an idea started coming into focus. And half-way through that first cup of coffee, I started drawing a mind-map with the ideas that were coming into my still-dreamy head. And now, the whole story is laid out before me.

I think God has a sense of humor, because the idea he gave me is a fiction story. Yet all my experience is writing non-fiction. To pull this off, I’ll have to dig deep into my past, when I was a young kid who loved to make up stories. I’m excited.

Anyway, if you’re interested in following my progress with this challenge, check back once in awhile. I’ll try to share the experience. October 17th, 2015 … wish me luck.


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Feeling Lost

confusion

I just finished revision 12 of the book I’m writing. I usually feel excited when I finish a revision, but not this time. I think it’s because the book finally feels done. By done I mean that the content is finished. Yet it still needs a good editing for grammar and all that mechanical stuff.

But now that the book feels so close to being finished, I’m feeling a bit lost. I don’t know what to do next. Oh, this morning I messed around with the book proposal a bit – yes, I’ve decided to first try the traditional publishing route. Also, I recently submitted my first query letter to a literary agency. But I currently don’t feel the energy I have when I’m working on the actual book.

Maybe I just need a break to re-charge. But I don’t want to take a break. Even though I don’t feel much energy right now, I still have a driving passion to get this book into the hands of as many people as possible. I believe this book has the power to heal troubled hearts.

Are you a writer who has walked a similar path? Have you ever felt lost while in the middle of a book project? Do you feel that way now?


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His Hands With Mine

ghost writer

Haven’t been blogging lately. Been too busy working on the book I’m writing with God. I know that might sound weird to you, but that’s the way it feels to me. And for me, there’s no other way to write, as I’m not by nature a writer. So I pray as I write, often spending more time with my eyes closed than with my fingers on the keyboard. Okay, so progress seems slow – just a good test for my natural impatience.

Anyway, I just felt like checking in with my blog today. And I want express my gratitude to God for having His hands on the keyboard along with mine.


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Breaking Into My Anxious Thoughts

coffee with Jesus

A typical morning: coffee mug warming my hands, Jesus Calling devotional opened to yesterday (I’m usually a day behind), and my mind ping-ponging between the book on my lap and the Spirit of Jesus within my mind. And of course, my mind often takes a side trip and finds something to be anxious about.

This morning it was the idea of eventually publishing the book I’m writing. The marketing piece of this project isn’t very appealing, though it’s something I feel comfortable with. But like most would-be authors (I suspect), I would rather spend my time writing than marketing. The accelerated blogging, more time on Facebook, and whatever other opportunities make sense at the time – all this was feeling more like a dark cloud on the horizon than something to get excited about.

Then Jesus broke into my anxious thoughts. He immediately reminded me that it’s not up to me whether the book gets published, or up to anyone else. It’s God’s decision. And that’s just the way I want it. Having God in charge of this book project removes all of my self-induced stress. Jesus broke into my anxious thoughts, and the anxiety melted away. And I’m so grateful.


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My Never-Ending Painting Project

GG Bridge

The Golden Gate Bridge – an icon of engineering risk-taking. To protect the bridge from the constant onslaught of corrosive salty air, high-climbing painters sandblast off the old paint and replace it with fresh paint. This continues until the painters finish the entire bridge, and then they start all over again, going back to the beginning. It’s a never-ending painting project.

This is how it feels with the book I’m writing. As soon as I finish one revision, I go back to the beginning and start working on the next revision. I recently started working on revision 11 – by now I should just be making fine adjustments. But I’ve been taking the heavy-duty sandblaster to this revision, removing large chunks of old “paint” and replacing them with fresh paint. It’s my never-ending “painting” project. And I love the work.


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Writing With His Voice

writing voice

Knowing with certainty that the Holy Spirit of Jesus lives within me, my goal while writing is to have my self quietly stay in the background, so that the voice that makes it to the paper will be His voice, Jesus’ voice. I often fail, for my self won’t shut up. Being the selfish self that I am, my own voice wants to be heard. But sometimes I’m quiet enough to hear Jesus within me, and let His voice make it to the paper. Those are the best writing times.


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Finding Jesus in My Writing

ghost writer

I recently got some great advice from an editor friend of mine, and now I’m totally re-writing the first chapter of the book I’m working on. As for the rest of the book – I don’t know yet. Revision 11 is looking meaty. What revision will be the final one, 22?

When will this book be finished? I’m three months away from the seven year anniversary of the day I started working on this book. Whether I ever publish it or not, I sure would like to finish it someday. I’m getting impatient. I want to be done with it. Here I am, still getting up each morning way before sunrise, just so I can have an hour or two to write before going to work. Seven years now of the same routine, and the end still looks far off and blurry.

This morning I was praying about all this, again. And thank you Jesus for reminding me what’s important.

It’s not finishing the book that’s important, at least right now. The focus may shift to finishing at some time, but right now it’s all about writing. What gets me out of bed each morning is the joy of finding Jesus in my writing. When my words are His words – this is what I chase after each morning. And when I’m able to empty myself enough to let Him write through me, those are the best moments of my day. Well worth getting out of bed before the crows. And I’ll keep at it until Jesus says it’s done.


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Falling Into My Stress-Pit

Out-of-the-Slimy-Pit

As a kid, when I would run out the backdoor to wander the hills behind our house, my mom liked to shout, “Don’t fall in a hole.” Even now, as a much older kid, if I tell mom that my wife and I are going on a hike, she’ll end the phone call with, “Don’t fall in a hole.”

Well, I recently fell again in that same old hole of my own digging. While on the journey of writing a book, I started over-planning my next steps. The revision I’m now working on will be followed with a good cleaning up by an editor friend of mine. I need to finalize the proposal. I will then follow the path of trying to convince a traditional Christian publisher, by submitting the proposal to the Christian Manuscript Submission website. And if that doesn’t get anyone’s attention, I’d turn to the path of self-publishing, likely with the help of Westbow Press. And I could ask my artistic niece to create a cover design – I really like that idea. These, and more tasks, started crowding my thoughts. And of course, I started dreaming up a schedule for all of this.

I was deep in the hole now, over my head in the stress-pit of my over-planning. The fun was dying from my book project.

But thankfully, Jesus reminded me of my folly. He reminded me that it’s His plans and schedules that are important. He’ll take care of the timing. All I need to do is make myself available to Him, to write when He wants me to write, and to do all that other stuff only when the time is right. The stress is now gone… at least until I start digging my hole again.


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My Elevator Pitch

Elevator Pitch

I’ve been working on refining the description of the book I’m writing. I think it’s about time – I’ve been working on this thing for almost seven years, and I tend to awkwardly stumble to an answer when people ask what the book is about. Lately I’ve been working on the elevator pitch; the briefest of descriptions. Here’s what I have so far, maybe for an elevator ride of about five floors.

Book title: His Truth Will Set You Free; knocking down the prison walls of manmade religion.

Pitch: The manmade false ideas that pollute Christianity are like large stones in a prison wall, mortared together by pride and greed, holding captive unwary believers and barricading those seeking answers. This book demolishes the prison walls of false messages with the mighty truth of Jesus Christ.

I’m curious; based on that brief description, would you read such a book?


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My Jar of Clay

jar of clay

While reading a devotional this morning, I saw a new image for the book I’m writing about the truth of Christianity. The book is like a flawed jar of clay. It cannot help but be flawed, for it comes out of me and contains my flaws. But this book of imperfect and sometimes cracked clay is filled with the power and glory of God, for the words within came from His inspiration.

Just as I myself am a flawed vessel, filled with the Spirit of God – I like this image of the book I’m writing. For I write with God, my inspiration.


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Back to the Pen

writer

The book I’m writing has been incubating for almost 3 months – that’s how long it’s been since I finished revision 10. While praying yesterday, it came to me that the Holy Spirit within me is now ready to start working on rev 11. At least, this is what I believe, and hope. When I think the Spirit of Jesus is speaking to me, sometimes I’m not sure. Sometimes I think these ideas come into my mind just because that’s what I desire.

I have hopes for this book; hopes that over time the truths within the book will touch and heal the hearts of many people. But I also hope that whatever path the book takes is the path defined by Jesus. His will be done, not mine.

No matter where it goes from here, today I start working on rev 11, because I believe this is what God wants me to do. How will I know if I’m following God’s will and not just my own? I think the outcome will be my answer. Wherever this book ends up will tell me which path I followed.


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Lifting me out of this pit

Out-of-the-Slimy-Pit

This writing gig gets me all confused and stressed out. To self-publish my book, or chase after a traditional publisher? To try to lure an agent, or not? Should I even bother trying to publish? How to attract followers to this blog? How to increase page hits? Should I even bother trying to attract followers, or instead focus on a simpler motive for writing blog posts?

Today is a typical morning for me; my mind is a jumble of random thoughts and questions, all in search of a purpose and direction. And in the middle of this mess is my selfish beast, wanting it all MY way.

Some mornings I get bogged down in the muck of my own self-centeredness. But today I was lifted out of this muddy pit and set down on the higher ground of solid humility. Of course, the Holy Spirit within me did the lifting.

Now, the stress and confusion are gone. My only desire is to be hands and feet for God.

Dear Lord, dear Spirit who shares this body of mine, I am yours. These hands are yours, resting on this keyboard. This mind is yours. My heart and soul are yours. Why? Because of love. I love you so much dear Spirit of Jesus. You’ve given me life. You’ve given me purpose. You’ve given me love beyond understanding. Please help me to not waste your gift of love. You came for me… I’m here for you.

Amen


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A Big Step for Me

big step

Six years! That’s how long, so far, I’ve been working on writing my first book. And finally, it’s about ready to publish. Friends ask me if it’s finished. I say yes, but it never feels finished. I feel I could forever tinker with it. But for now, the tinkering is over. I believe God is telling me to jump out of my boat and take the next big step in this journey with Him… start submitting the book to publishers.

I could self-publish of course. That would be easy. But there’s not much about this six year journey that has been easy for me, so why start now. And besides, something tells me God wants me to first try traditional publishing.

So the first thing I’m going to do is submit a proposal through the Christian Manuscript Submission (CMS) website. It seems like a cool way to get the book proposal in front of many different publishers.

Do any of you have experience with CMS? I could really use some advice.

Thanks, and I hope you all have a great day. CJ


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More is Less

Over the past several months, many people have commented on the brevity of my posts. It seems that they find fewer words are more powerful and helpful. So I thought I’d share with you two things that inspire my pithy writing.

First is the book “On Writing Well,” by William Zinsser, where he stresses the benefits of brevity.

Yet for me, my most important inspiration comes from God… “The more the words, the less the meaning, and how does that profit anyone?” (Ecclesiastes 6:11)


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A New Look

cropped-wound-group-cover-photo2.jpg

If you’re wondering, this is the right place. Actually, the “right” place is a matter of opinion, which I leave to you. But this is likely the place you were expecting to land with your last mouse click. I just decided to change the look of the blog site.

It’s been over six years since I started this blog, and I felt it was time for a wardrobe change. And in a way, it’s symbolic of some changes in me…

When I first starting writing in this blog, those six years ago, I believe I still held onto anger towards churches that abuse the truth of Jesus Christ, and I let that anger spill onto the keyboard. Well, maybe wisdom comes with age, for I no longer want to fill my posts with acquisitions, even if based on absolute truth.

All I want to do now is write about the truth of Jesus Christ, and that means letting His love spill onto the keyboard while I write. For me, it’s a new look, and I like it.


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Writing Limbo

writing limbo

After six years of sporadic writing, I finally finished revision 10 of the book I’m working on with God; working title, His Truth Will Set You Free. It seemed to me that rev 10 was final draft quality, so I decided to get copies printed and ask my family to read it. This has been a huge moment for me, since my main reason for writing this book has been to offer the truth of Christianity to people I love who currently do not know Jesus.

Anyway, I now find myself in a very weird place. I feel a bit meaningless. After six years of getting up long before the sun, just so I can get in some writing time before work, it now feels like I have nothing to do with my time. Maybe I’m feeling a bit of temporary post-partum depression, or something like that.

Well, this morning, while sitting in writing limbo, I started re-reading one of my favorite books, The Power of the Spirit, by William Law. Talk about power – Law doesn’t give you a chance to get warmed up. A powerful message of the truth of the Holy Spirit erupts from the very first pages. And he affirmed for me a truth that has kept me writing for six years; anything good that may appear in me, truly comes from the Spirit of God within me. For all good comes from God.

Anything good within the book I’m writing comes from God, not me. I’m just His pen. And I’m so grateful.


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Practicing Trust

practice trust

I’ve been working a lot lately on trusting God, with my writing (book and blog), with work, with all my relationships. And I’ve seen that like everything in our lives, with practice, trusting God becomes easier.

It’s becoming easier for me to just relax and let Him guide my steps, guide my hand as I write, guide my words as I speak. And it’s a blast! This sense of real, sincere trust and what I see as He guides me – it’s really fun. This is joy, the joy of trust.

Oh, dear Jesus, thank you so much. As your peace and joy is beyond understanding, so is my gratitude beyond my ability to express. I am yours. Now let’s go have some fun and work on the book.