CJ Penn's Online Writing Hangout

The reason I write: To promote Christian truth and help Jesus get His Christianity back.

Tag Archives: Thoughts


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Chasing Peace – Day 17

There’s always something to feel guilty about. Sucks. Yesterday, day 17 of my journey to find peace, I was haunted by a memory that filled me with guilt. I hate that feeling. But part of the misery of guilt is my feeling that I deserve to feel miserable. I’m so messed up.

But then I remembered this new path I’m on in this journey, my path to absolute surrender to Jesus. And as soon as I focused my mind on my surrender to Jesus, the misery of guilt disappeared. Now this was weird, because Jesus was one of the people I had hurt in my memory of guilt. But then it hit me…

Surrender to Jesus is freedom from guilt. Guilt is surrender to memories of the past. Instead of surrendering to the past, surrender to the Spirit of Jesus, within you. With Him there is no guilt; only love, and peace.

Surrender is so freeing.

 

← Day 16                    Day 18 →

 


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Time Travel… to the Very Beginning

What was the essence of humanity in the beginning? I mean way back, right after the creation, but before sin polluted our spirit.

Well, God created humanity in His image, and God is love. Therefore in the beginning, humanity was love. Love was the complete meaning of what it was to be human. The only emotion Adam and Eve felt was love… until selfishness took over, and the sin that spawns from it.

When you see two people truly in love – humble love – you are seeing back in time, to the beginning. In this way, love is a portal to the past, to the time before selfishness and sin, and to a time when humanity lived in the very presence of God. So maybe when you see true love, you are also seeing through that portal all the way to God. When you see love, you are seeing God.


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Chasing Peace – Day 11

Jesus… He in me, and I in Him. (John 14:20) What’s it mean? The He in me part I can visualize. I can see in my minds eye the Spirit of Jesus actually here within my body, sharing space with my soul, keeping constant company with my spirit.

Yet I’ve tended to ignore the I in Him part, maybe because I don’t understand it. But for some reason, I thought about it yesterday morning as I was getting ready to continue my journey chasing peace.

Maybe I in Him means that I’m a part of Jesus’ life, like He is a part of my life. I’m surrounded by Jesus – He’s everywhere, inside and out. I like this. It feels good to me, and right. And hey, Jesus is in you, and you are in Jesus – what does this mean to you?

Well, with Jesus in me, and I in Him, I stepped back onto the path of my journey to peace. Day 11 was a good day.

 

← Day 10                    Day 12 →

 


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Chasing Peace – Day 10

If you read my Day-9 entry, you’ll see that I crashed. One of my “tricks” for escaping stress and finding peace wasn’t working. I’d been telling myself that all my tasks at work are meaningless – all the stuff that tightens my chest and fills me with stress. What’s more meaningful are my relationships with my co-workers. This new way of thinking had been helping me, for a while.

Yet the stress-machines at work sure haven’t been feeling meaningless lately. They’ve been exerting their ever-present power over me. And then yesterday, Day 10 of my journey, I was thinking about this meaningless idea as I drove home from another day in the stress-pit. And oh so glad it was Friday.

Anyway, it occurred to me that I don’t really believe that all those work tasks are meaningless. I’d been trying to lie to myself.

Look, it’s simple. All my tasks and all the tasks that my co-workers do, help contribute to the success of our little company. And everyone there is relying on that success for a paycheck. Enough said. I can’t dodge the meaning of people’s livelihoods.

I’m confusing myself. But maybe I’m getting closer; closer to an answer. Forget the tricks. Forget trying to con myself. There’s only one path to the peace I’m seeking… Jesus.

 

←Day 9                    Day 11 →

 


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Time for Some Changes…

I’ve been re-thinking my purpose for writing, whether blog posts or the books I’m working on. I’ve been thinking about this in terms of peoples needs I hope to fill. This is what I’ve come up with so far…

  • Help people escape the stress in their life. Show them how to replace the stress with the peace they are looking for.
  • Help people feel the same freedom and joy we felt as children. Do you remember that, the days of fun and play?
  • Help people find a sense of purpose and fulfillment, and find this in their relationship with God.
  • Help people feel loved. I hope to help people find and feel the Fatherly love of God.
  • Help people find freedom from the influence of false ideas about Christianity. Show them the freedom that comes from the truth.
  • Help people know and accept that true Christianity is all about a relationship, not rules.
  • Dechurched Christians, like me, may be looking for a sense of belonging, like me. Show them how to find that.
  • Help dechurched Christians find freedom from any guilt they may feel because they no longer attend church.
  • Show people how to find and have an intimate and personal relationship with God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. Help them know the Holy Spirit of God as a person, rather than an idea. And help them feel His presence in their lives.

What do you think about this? Please let me know. Does this look like too much to you? Does it leave you with the sense that I have an over-inflated idea of my talent for helping people? After all, this is a lot. But truth is, I’m just a searching human like you, with all the same needs I’ve listed above. I’m no expert in any of this – all I can do is share what I’ve learned, and continue to learn, in my own search.

Another change I’m planning to make is that I will soon start sending out periodic emails with stuff targeted to help fill the needs I’ve listed above. I’ll send these email messages to everyone who would like to subscribe to receive them. I will probably send an email once a week, or maybe every other week. I’m curious, what do you think of this email idea?

By the way, I really appreciate the ideas and comments you might share with me. These changes I’m planning to make are a bit scary, and the support I get from those who visit and follow this blog is like comfort food.

Thank you. From my heart, CJ


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Why Doesn’t God Give Up?

Sometimes I try to look at this world from a detached perspective. Like, how would this mashed up mixture of humanity look to an alien from another planet?

So much strife, and evil, and violence, and arrogance, and judgment, and hypocrisy, and selfishness, and hate, and on the list goes. What a mess we are!

And then I wonder… why doesn’t God give up on this failed experiment of humanity? If I were Him, I would have walked away a long time ago. But He didn’t give up. He hasn’t walked away. In fact, He sacrificed His Son in order to save this experiment.

WOW! God must love us a lot.


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Escaping Into Yourself

Is stress lurking around the corner, waiting for you to step out your door and head off to work or school? Or has stress invaded your house? Is it standing beside your bed, just waiting for you to open your eyes, and your mind, and let it invade your thoughts?

As you go about your day, there is a way to escape from stress. Close your eyes and step inside yourself. You may still hear the world and stress clamoring for your attention. But as you go deeper into yourself, two things happen. The noise of the world becomes muffled, and your view of Jesus becomes clearer. And the more you feel the truth of the presence of the Spirit of Jesus within you, the less you will feel the stress that you left locked outside. For the peace of Jesus’ presence will envelope you and protect you.

Oh yes, you’ll have to step outside again and deal with life. But you always have a place to escape, and a person to escape to; you and Jesus, living together in your quiet place of peace.


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When All You Have Is Self

When all you have is selfishness, the meaning in your life is defined by your selfish desires. “Me, me, me” defines you. And since its part of our human nature, we all are selfish, each to our own degree.

But there’s misery in selfishness. For reasons I don’t understand, selfishness seems to hold onto pain. Selfishness cannot forgive. Selfishness is alone. Selfishness is greedy. And selfishness is rarely satisfied with life. When all you have is self, life is miserable. When you all have is self, you cannot truly see others, and you cannot see Jesus.

But when you begin to add humility to your natural selfishness, misery diminishes as your selfishness is diluted by the humility. And where selfishness clouds your vision, humility opens your horizon. And when you can look beyond self, you will truly and clearly begin to see the Spirit of Jesus, within you. And that’s when life begins.


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Wreckage?

I’m floating in a sea,

surrounded by debris and wreckage.

The wreckage of this broken world;

the wreckage of my life.

Surrounded,

unable to clearly see the horizon

for all the wreckage.

I search the horizon for Jesus.

I look for Father God.

I know they are here;

something inside me feels their presence.

But the wreckage crowds my view.

Without God, there is only wreckage.

…

And finally, the wreckage breaks up.

And God opens a way, from Him to me.

And now He’s here;

His Spirit is within me, floating here with me.

And the wreckage pulls away from God,

unable to touch Him.

With the Spirit of God and Jesus within me,

the wreckage of my life floats off,

and I feel peace.

———————-

This is a typical morning for me, quietly sitting with coffee mug in hand, surrounded by the wreckage that fills my mind. And then God appears. Oh Lord! Dear Jesus! I love you as much as I am able. And I live because you live within me.


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Blogging Friends

My blog friends filled my thoughts as I filled my mug with coffee this morning. We’ve never met in person, but I see you whenever you “like” or comment on one of my posts. I smile when I see your familiar name and image show up in my email, announcing your visit to my blog. I feel we know each other in a small way.

And as I thought of you this morning, I became filled with gratitude. I’m grateful for you and your visits. I’m grateful for your friendship, unconventional as it is. And I’m grateful for Jesus, for He brought us together. It was our mutual relationships with Jesus that connected us via this intangible, untouchable realm called the Internet.

And now I’m thinking… Jesus is all about relationships, and friendships. He promised He will be our friend, if we believe in Him. And I now see Him using manmade things such as the Internet to help make other friendships, such as yours and mine. That’s kind of cool.

But back to my original thought… thank you blogging friend. Thanks for your visits. I hope you have a great day.

CJ


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Living in the Moment

Like a lot of people, I tend to live for the future. I have goals and dreams I hope to achieve. Often I project myself into the future, imagining I’ve living my goal. And my imagination can get pretty focused and detailed. But this imagining of the future almost always ends in disappointment.

The disappointment is usually bred from my impatience… I want to bring tomorrow’s dreams into today. I want to reach my goals NOW. But I guess the disappointment is good, because that’s when I tend to step back, fall down, and pray.

And this is what comes to me in those times when I quiet my mind, damp down my active imagination, and listen for the Spirit of Jesus: by focusing on tomorrow, I’m missing the chance to live in the moment, which is where the Holy Spirit lives.

But then I wondered what it means to live in the moment. Well, for me it means to live WITH the Holy Spirit, sharing the moment with Him, and with His guidance look for things I can do now, for Him. For example, no matter where I am or what I’m doing, there’s always an opportunity to have a relationship with someone, to interact with whomever I’m with, aided by the presence of Jesus. And for those times when I’m alone, I can focus on my relationship with the Holy Spirit of Jesus, who is always with me.

There’s no disappointment there.

But my imagination still likes to run ahead into the future. I wish I could sling a lasso around that rambunctious boy and keep him here with me, and Jesus. Oh well… it’s who I am.


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Satan is Terrified

Jesus confronted Satan many times during His life on earth. This morning I was reading about one of those times in the gospel of Mark. Jesus came across a demon-possessed man causing trouble among some tombs. In referring to the man, Mark writes:

“When he saw Jesus from a distance, he ran and fell on his knees in front of him. He shouted at the top of his voice, ‘What do you want with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? In God’s name don’t torture me!’” (Mark 5:6-7)

The demons of Satan were absolutely terrified of Jesus. Satan fell on his knees at Jesus’ feet and begged Jesus for mercy. I stopped reading and just focused on that fact. What does it mean to me, that Satan is terrified of Jesus? Think about it – what does it mean to you?


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My Enemy My Mind

A quiet morning, a favorite time, sitting here alone with God.

Well, not really alone.

There’s my mind, not content with sitting still, often up and dancing away to other places.

My will is to still my mind and focus all my thoughts on the Holy Spirit of Jesus, here within me.

I try feeding my mind coffee, hoping that will help it gain control of itself.

But that doesn’t always work.

My mind will rest with Jesus for a few moments, and then jump up and chase after the next passing thought.

Random thoughts have more control over my mind than I do.

I often think my mind is my enemy, for it rarely goes where I want to go.

I want to rest my thoughts with you, dear Jesus, every waking moment.

I want to give You all of my mind.

For I trust your word…

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” (Matthew 22:37)

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2)

“Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” (Colossians 3:2)


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The Spirit Speaks – What do I Mean to You?

bicycle for two 2

What does it mean to you to have me, the Spirit of Jesus Christ, living within you? How can this reality affect how you experience today? What would your day look like if you took my hand and followed me, instead of trying to lead?

Envision you and me on a bicycle for two, with me in the front seat, steering our way around life’s obstacles. How would this feel, to be able to just sit back and watch me steer our way through today, instead of trying to steer yourself?

Please, find some quiet time, empty your mind of the distractions of life, and think about these questions. And if you like, leave a comment here, sharing what answers come into your mind. And then, sit back, relax, and let me steer.


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The Spirit Speaks – It’s a Noisy World, isn’t it?

Noise of the world

I, the Spirit of Jesus Christ, know how hard it is to empty your mind and focus on me. I know how loud the noise of the world is. And the fact that I don’t yell at you, that I remain peacefully quiet within you – this may not help.

When I walked the earth as a man, I too was surrounded by the noise of the world, the constant chatter and demands for attention. The noise was intense at times. So in order to have time with my Father, I had to first escape the noise around me. I had no home, no room I could go to, no door to shut to block out the noise. So I often escaped to an isolated place in the country, far away from the deafening noise of humanity.

And my Father was always there, waiting for me. But the noise still tried to crowd Him out, as it tries to crowd me out of your life. It took some time to first empty my mind of the noise. But once I did, I and my Father were one, without the noise getting in the way.

It’s not difficult, but it does take effort, and time. Once you are in your quiet place, you need to give yourself enough time to flush the noise of your world out of your mind. And once the noise has died down, it’s just you and me. And you will find that there is no better place in life than those moments when it’s just the two of us, alone together.


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The Spirit Speaks – of Second Chances

new life

You have a second chance at life – it’s my promise to you. For I, the Spirit of Jesus Christ, give to you the chance of a new birth into a new life. If you’re not happy with your life, or simply bored with life, look to me. And I will deliver you to a new life, filled with hope and joy and love and excitement. For living with me is never boring.

Oh, I know some out there may give you the impression that life as a “Christian” is boring. And I know there are some who paint an image of Christianity that is not very pretty. But that’s just their own human flaws showing through – all people share similar flaws. There’s no blame… it’s just the way it is.

But please don’t judge me, please don’t judge the promise of a new life I offer you, by what you see in others. Look beyond what you see in them, and look directly to me. And you will see the truth, and my truth will set you free to live a new life, to have a second chance.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.” (1 Peter 1:3)


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The Spirit Speaks – of Your Childhood

Child of God

Your childhood is now. No matter how old you are, no matter where your heart is, no matter what you think about me – the Spirit of Jesus Christ – or my Father, you are a child of God, right now.

I know some people who believe that you are only a true child of God once you believe in me and accept me as your savior. Some believe that God considers you His child only after you show true faith in Him and me. But what kind of father is that? That sounds like a father who loves with conditional love, a love that’s given as a reward for belief. But my Father’s love is unconditional. My Father’s love is true, and constant and never changing.

Look, I once told a story about a wayward son who left his father. You may know this as the story of the Prodigal Son. The son disowned the father, in effect declaring the father dead to the son. But the father never disowned the son. In fact, the father kept looking for the son to return home, and when the son finally changed his ways and headed for home, the father ran to him and welcomed him with compassion and love. The father in this story is an image of God. And like the father in this story, your Father God never lets go of you as His child.

You are a child of God. And your Father is ever scanning the horizon, looking for you to turn to Him. And when you do, He will run to you, and pour His love into you.


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The Spirit Speaks – of the Wall of Lies, and the Truth That Will Bring it Down

wall of lies

Yesterday I spoke with you about the wall – the wall of false ideas that stands between you and me. I, the Spirit of Jesus Christ, see this wall clearly. I can bring down this wall. But first you need to see it for yourself; you need to experience its reality. Then you will be able to feel the true magnitude of my love as I bring the wall to ruin.

How can you see a spiritual wall? Well, first you need to see each stone for what it truly is. Everything you’ve ever heard about me and the church I built, that is false – it’s these lies which are the stones in the wall, blocking your view of the truth. To see the stones of lies, you need to first know the truth.

You will find the truth in my written word… the Bible. And in prayer, for prayer is where you will find me. I will open your mind to the truth, for I am the Spirit of truth. And my truth will set you free from imprisonment behind the wall of lies.

“And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever – the Spirit of truth.” (John 14:16-17)

“When he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth.” (John 16:13)


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The Spirit Speaks – of Today

meadow path

A new day begins. What lies ahead on the path you will wander today? Does stress prowl around that bend up ahead, waiting to pounce and devour? Or will you stroll through a meadow of peace and solitude, daydreaming your way along the flower-lined path? Or, will the trail lead along a cliff of despair, with a solid rock wall to your right, and the shear drop on your left? Will you have to cling to the wall with an aching heart, trying not to fall into absolute misery?

Wherever your path leads you today, please take me, the Spirit of Jesus Christ, with you.

Alone, stress can indeed devour you. But together, we both can fight it off.

And including me in your moments of peace makes those daydreams so much sweeter. You will find the meadow of peace more refreshing when you share it with me.

And you may find that isolation may actually lead you to the cliff of despair. But with me living within you, we can find an easier route around that cliff, together.

Please, look inside yourself today, for me. I’m waiting for you there. And together we can march into the adventure of this day.


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The Spirit Speaks – of Your Holiness

holiness

What does it mean to you to be holy? To me, the Spirit of Jesus Christ, and to my Father God, by believing in me you are holy, now. For by your faith, your sins are no more.

You cannot become holy by anything you do. You are holy because of what I already did for you. I took upon myself the penalty for your sins, and I paid the price. Now, in God’s sight your sins are no more. Your sins are forgotten, as if they never happened. This is holiness: you are clean and pure, in God’s eyes. It is done; it is finished. All you need do is believe in my sacrifice for you and accept my gift of holiness. That’s faith.

Please, accept my gift, so painfully given to you. And be free of the burden of your past sins.

 

“We have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.” (Hebrews 10:10)

“Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation – if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel.” (Colossians 1:21-23)